Shark Horse (Part 10)

Shark Horse
Chapter 10: The SharkShank Redemption!
By Jeffrey Kieviet

“If music be the food of love, play on!” – William Shakespeare; 1602

“My anaconda don’t want none unless you got buns, hun.” – Anthony Ray (Sir Mix-a-Lot); 1992

“I wanna f*ck you like an animal” – Trent Reznor (Nine Inch Nails); 1994

“My money is yours, give you a little more because I love ya.” – Justin Bieber; 2009

“… Did Bieber just call me a whore?” – Me; a few moments ago

*Warning: Graphic Sexual Content*

Lady Shark Horse
Illustration by Jesse Moriarty. Click on Lady Shark Horse to visit Jesse’s Artist Website.

Canyon Del Muerto, Arizona: 1959

Domino Gómez dyed her hair red and tried desperately to be a picture perfect personification of Lucille Ball, even though “I Love Lucy” had ended its run over a year ago. Her father had left when she was a baby; reared by her mother who was a blend of her Ginger-Jewish ancestry and her husband’s Mexican influences. Domino had watched the show with religious devotion on their small black-and-white television in her cramped kitchen while her mother was off working late, cleaning other people’s houses when she could barely take care of their tiny mobile home. Lucy & Ricky seemed like such a wonderful couple, and no matter how royally Lucy ruined Ricky’s life, he stayed and he loved her. It was an ultimate representation of how her parents could have been, she could have been the beloved Little Ricky with two normal (or, at least, present) parents, a couple of neighbors who would check in from time to time, and the occasional zany antic that would bond them closer as a family.

Instead she was a teenager with daddy issues who treated the high school football team like her personal amusement park, riding every ride until she was ready to barf. She was striking, skin the color of well mixed chocolate milk, hidden freckles on her cheeks, a stern nose that directed attention to her pouty lips, and the vivid fakeness of her hair color only added to her surreal beauty. Every guy at Azul Martinez High School wanted her and she was happy to give. Happiness is fleeting.

Darker skin and a few freckles and you've got Domino Gomez.
Darker skin and a few freckles and you’ve got Domino Gomez.

She grew tired of the sameness, the meaninglessness, the lack of fulfillment, regardless of how often she was filled. Unfortunately, it took an “unmentionable” event to inspire change from within. Afterwards, on her way home, sitting on the bus, still feeling the sudden emptiness in her wallet and in her gut, hating that she couldn’t even turn to her mom to ask for help, she realized she wanted a decent guy. Someone to stand by her when she needed him, someone to help out when a “mistake” happened, maybe even someone who didn’t think it was a “mistake,” someone who could be a good father.

Her mind was pregnant with these thoughts as she walked the halls of Azul Martinez High School, her head bowed, her hair falling in front of her face, and she saw the slouching shoulders of Joseph Sigo come into focus between her red theatre curtains. His back was to her, he was sitting on the stairwell leading down to the basement, his nose buried in a book. As a senior, she’d only spoken to the junior a handful of times; he mostly kept to himself. He had a bit of a reputation for fighting, not that Domino could remember seeing one of these fights, but he seemed to draw the attention of nasty people. The legend was he was NOT a good fighter, the entire offensive line bragged about the time they duct taped him inside a garbage can, and when he finally got out (2 days later) he got his ass kicked when he confronted them seeking justice, but that story said more about the man he was (or at least the man he would be) than about the cowards that had outnumbered and attacked him. This boy, not big for his age, on the verge of wiry & lanky, stood up for himself, stood up for what he believed in. And that was just what she was looking for.

“What’re you reading?” She asked in her sumptuous voice.

Joseph turned and was stunned to see the beautiful woman addressing him. Of course he knew Domino, at least knew of her, had seen her around school and, like most boys, had listed after her beauty. But since he lost his great love in junior high (Shark Horse Part 8), he didn’t seek the attention of girls. Sure, he’d attended a few of the school dances and had gone to the movies on a couple group dates, but he preferred his own company. He loved to cook & read, and his grandmother was getting old, and taking care of her took up a lot of his free time. Not that he minded; he took great pride in taking care of such a great woman. But now this other woman, Domino Gómez, had stolen his attention and was staring at him with the most rapacious look in her eyes. “Uh, Twelfth Night,” he replied after the awkward delay her physical presence had inflicted upon him.

“Neat. I don’t think I’ve read that. Shakespeare, right? You in one of those advanced classes?” She knew he was smart; her smile broadened at the thought of big brained babies.

“Yes. But I’m not reading it for class, I’m just… reading it.” His cheeks blushed with embarrassment.

“Oh, a book worm, huh? Read me something.” She sat down beside him on the stairs, the brief rubbing of their elbows sending warmth through both their bodies.

“Now?” Joseph was taken aback. He liked his books, but he read them to himself, it was a solitary action. She was inviting herself into his private space. She smiled as an affirmative response and he didn’t mind her invasion.

There are no good pictures that adequately represent Twelfth Night.
There are no good pictures that adequately represent Twelfth Night.

He read her a sonnet, something pretty about love, the human condition, all that mushy stuff. Then she wanted to read something to him, then they spent a few moments going back and forth reading the lines aloud as if they were the characters, Olivia falling for Cesario, Viola hiding her true self from Duke. Joseph had never been interested in drama or the theatre, but he found himself delving into the character as Domino brought Viola to life. And that’s when something wholly unexpected happened: “Would you like to go out this weekend?” It was the first time Joseph had asked a girl out on a date.

“I’d like that very much,” Domino replied.

They made plans to go out on a date that Friday night. Joseph was giddy. Not as innocently (foolishly) in love as he’d been with Arion in Junior High, but he was still excited. He bought a new shirt and borrowed his grandmother’s truck to take her some place special. When he picked her up from school (where they’d agreed to meet; Domino didn’t want her mother to give her any trouble about “boys,” even though this was the best guy she’d ever gone out with), she was wrapped in sweaters and jackets to hide from the cold desert night air. Even though, all covered and bundled, he told her she looked beautiful as he opened the passenger seat door for her.

“Y0u look nice tonight.” He shivered a bit as he slammed the door (the creaky beast of a vehicle required a little elbow grease to get the doors shut).

As Domino unbundled to get comfortable in the trucks heat, she smothered a smile of glee in one of her sweaters so he wouldn’t see her excitement. Joseph climbed into the driver’s seat and when they met eyes, Domino let out a small & heart-felt, “thank you.” Guys didn’t pay her the little compliments like that.

They left the parking lot and Joseph tentatively threw out suggestions like dinner or a movie (he couldn’t afford both but wasn’t about to tell her; if she wanted both they could go on another date next week), but Domino said she’d really like to take him to her special place. “There’s somewhere I go when I feel like I’ve got the world on my shoulders and I want to get away. Somewhere we can just be for a little while. I… uh… I haven’t been to this place with anybody before, but I’d like you to take me there if that’s alright.”

Joseph was cautious but willing. They took a dirt road out of town, and then randomly, at no discernible point in the road, Domino asked him to turn off and just drive into the open desert. Joseph had grown up in Arizona, this was not a safe idea, but he trusted Domino and headed off to nowhere. After about ten minutes Domino said this was the place. He stopped the truck but did not turn off the motor for fear of freezing to death without the vehicle’s heater. Domino asked him to turn off the trucks headlights, and out there, in the middle of nowhere, with no lights or other people around for miles, they looked up into the starry sky and were swallowed by the awesomeness of the universe.

They sat in silence for a moment, then Joseph turned to look at Domino and she was staring at him. Her eyes looked sad and full of wonder, but her mouth looked hungry. He leaned in, and placed a gentle kiss on her pouty lips. Her lips parted and her warm, wet tongue sought his. The gentle kisses became passionate bites and they pressed their bodies against each other as if they were starved for flesh. Clothes came off their slippery, sweaty bodies, fabric ripped with the ferocity of their vigor. On the pile of sweaters and jackets, Joseph’s new shirt ripped and missing buttons on the floor of the truck, they made explosive, wild, and passionate love. It was primal, Joseph clawed at her with his very being. Whatever was human left him and he became an animal. She retaliated with her lips, her hips, her body, responding to every touch and grab with an insatiable, ravenous lust that caused her to shriek with delight and pleasure. They howled into the sky, nearby wildlife fled in terror as the truck rocked & shook. Joseph felt a rumbling deep within him, Domino’s legs began to quiver, and with a white hot climax, their vision blurred and it seemed stars had fallen into the truck to surround them. They came together, or near enough as made no matter, and that was how the man who would be Shark Horse lost his virginity (sorry Grandma).

a little graphic car sex for ya'
a little graphic car sex for ya’

Afterwards, they lay entwined, staring out the windows at the starry night sky. Joseph didn’t know what to say. “How do you find your way back?”

Domino nuzzled his neck and sighed a sleepy “hmm?”

“I don’t know where we are. I don’t know how to find the road back. How do you go home after you come here?”

“That’s the beauty of this place.” Domino was seconds away from falling asleep in perfect comfort. “You have to wait until morning. You can’t leave until the sun rises.”

They slept in each other’s arms and dreamed of a beautiful future where Joseph & Domino were together forever, two lost souls who had found themselves in the middle of nowhere. But in the morning, things had changed. Domino didn’t say much on the drive home. In school, she avoided him for a few days, then ended up back in the locker room being made air-tight by some of the football players. Joseph was hurt, he didn’t understand. He tried to talk to her about it but she ignored him when she could, told him to “go away” and “get over it” when she couldn’t. In the end, all he could do was fondly remember that night. He went back to reading his books, cooking for & taking care of his grandmother, and didn’t pay much attention to girls.

Oil Derrick, Pacific Ocean: Present Day

(To catch up on the “Sea Wolf” story arc, read Parts EIGHT & NINE)

“You stay here, Commissioner Gallardo.” Shark Horse’s tone bristled with authority. “In this place, at least you’re safe from Sea Wolf. Arion, Lady Shark Horse, you can explain the plan on the way. Let’s go!” And with that, Shark Horse rushed out the door of the oil derrick, sunlight shimmering off of his dorsal fin like a shooting star, and he leapt over the railing, plummeting into the ocean with the aplomb of an olympic diver. Not one to be out shined (showned?), Lady Shark Horse followed suit, bursting into the sea with the ferocity of the mourning star.

Shark Horse was distraught in thought. What could be done about Sea Wolf? What could he say to Arion, his long lost love? How could the world go on without the resounding musical sensation that is Cake? Lady Shark Horse swam up next to him, her eyes filled with hunger.

“So, what’s the plan?” Shark Horse asked with a gruff rudeness that he didn’t intend, but he wasn’t about to back down now.

“You know, I’ve never seen you as such a powerful beast.” Their voices bubbled in the water. Lady Shark Horse ran her shark tongue across her gaping maw, the rows of teeth shimmering in the sunlight breaking through to their shallow depth.

“Arion, I’m not in the mood for games.” But something about the way she was looking at him, there wasn’t the youthful innocence of their childhood, but an adult lusting that reminded him more of Domino Gomez and the few other flings he’d had in his time as a virile man. Maybe it was just his shark sense, but her presence, swimming in the water next to him, was arousing.

Ah, the beauty of nature...
Ah, the beauty of nature…

Dear reader, I am not sure if you are familiar with the mating habits of sharks (or horses [or humans, for that matter]), but keep in mind that Shark Horse had been in his chimera body for over a year, with no relief other than the machinations his kind turtle friend Don had been able to create. So when the instinct took, it took with a vengeance.

Initiating the mating ritual, Shark Horse grabbed the Lady by her neck, giving a fierce nibble that would kill a normal creature, but only served to whet the appetite of Lady Shark Horse. “The ocean became wetter,” as one of the great poets once wrote. They swam in a small whirlpool, nipping at each other hard enough to draw blood, the metallic scent sending their shark senses into overdrive.

Bare with me a second, because these are 2 different species composed of alternating sexes, it gets a little complicated. So Lady Shark Horse becomes aroused and her horse dong is loosed from its sheath and begins to stiffen. Shark Horse, the great Joseph Sigo, turns his rear and presents his horse hoo-ha to the Lady, and “winks” his vagina. Believe me, to horses, this is a turn on. It’s basically the green light for the activities of the red light district. Lady Shark Horse bites his pectoral fin and mounts our hero with all the pizzaz of Hugh Hefner in his early years. Shark Horse’s feminine side, the equine side, quivered with the pleasurable penetration. However, his shark side, the masculine man who would just as soon fuck as be fucked, extended his elasmobranchian claspers, his 2 shark penises if you will (penisi?), and probed around the base of Lady Shark Horse’s erect member, finding sanctuary in the opening to her cloaca near her pelvic fin. In a truly beautiful yin-yang level of gross, nightmarish, cross-bred, bisexual – Neigh, ULTRAsexual – chimeric boning, they thrust against each other in the water. Each creature inside the other creature, stimulating, gyrating, blowing bubbles of rapture, they made sweet, wild love in a vortex that tore straight through to the ocean floor. They came together, or near enough as made no matter, and that was how Shark Horse, the man who was once Joseph Sigo, popped his Shark Horse cherry. Love, ain’t it grand?

They drifted in the current for what felt like an eternity, eventually finding shallow water near Newport Beach along the California coast. It was now late at night, or maybe early morning, and not a soul was to be found. Laying in the sand, they continued to embrace and breath in deeply, trying to recover from such passionate love-making, alternating between gulping the night air as the waves receded, and filling their gills with oxygen as each new wave crashed. After a moment, Lady Shark horse burst into tears.

“I- I can’t. God, I’m so sorry, please forgive me, Shark Horse.” Lady Shark Horse climbed to her feet (hooves) and turned to face the sea, her back to Shark Horse.

“Arion, of course I forgive you.” He was thinking of how she abandoned him back in middle school, left him for the dubious Lupa, the worthless cretin now known as Sea Wolf. “There’s nothing to forgive! We were young, we’ve lived our lives the best we knew how. But now is a new start, a chance to begin again. If we can defeat Lupa, we can finally be together, like I’ve always dreamed.” Shark Horse was shocked he was being so dramatic, but decades of emotional barricades had been destroyed by the good sex.

“You fool!” Lady Shark Horse shouted at him. “I’m not Arion! I don’t know Arion, I’ve never met Arion. I’m just a pawn, a worthless lackey, in Sea Wolf’s dastardly plan to destroy you, to destroy your soul.”

Shark Horse was stunned. He couldn’t move, couldn’t react. “I… don’t understand. Who are you?”

“Sea Wolf wanted to break you, to break the Shark Horse. He was going to kill the ones you loved, starting with Cake. He will find Commissioner Gallardo at the oil derrick, it may already be too late. He told me of your childhood sweetheart, wanted me to pretend to be her, to lure you into his trap, ruin anything that gave you strength, and then slowly, very slowly, he would drain the very life from you body. He hates you, Shark Horse, his hate is the most palpable, horrific thing I have ever seen.” She was rambling now, caught between tears and bursts of awful news which swam over Shark Horse, buckling his knees more than the strongest waves, the largest tsunami. Lady Shark Horse caught herself in a moment of clarity. “I’m no one, just another of Mangele’s failed creations. I was just a hammerhead shark, a good ol’ gal looking for nothing more than my next meal, when I was bit by a radioactive horse and became the monster you see before you today.”

Shark Horse’s mind was near bursting it was so full of confusion and questions. A radioactive horse? Does that mean he just had sex with an animal? If Lady Shark Horse wasn’t Arion, where was Arion, was she even still alive? “What does Lupa have planned? How can I stop him?” No time for the little thing in life, he had to kill Sea Wolf. “I have to save Gallardo if there’s still time.”

“I don’t know, I don’t know! You don’t understand, you can’t kill Sea Wolf. He and I were prison mates in Mengele’s twisted asylum. He was so powerful, so smart, I thought he was going to take over the world. But Mengele kept him restrained. I helped him escape, he said he would make me his queen! But after being with you, I know true love, true kindness; that was just amazing sex. I don’t know what we can do for Gallardo, but if we get Sea Wolf back to Sharkham Asylum, I know how we can stop him.”

I'm sorry for the gross Shark Horse sex. I'm also sorry for what happened in Grandma's car, please don't tell her.
I’m sorry for the gross Shark Horse sex. I’m also sorry for what happened in Grandma’s car, please don’t tell her.

Next time:

Will Shark Horse ever actually fight Sea Wolf? Or will Sea Wolf break the Shark Horse?

Will there be any repercussions of the weird, freaky, animal sex? (like maybe a baby? or did the whirlpool vortex awaken anything deep within the ocean?)

And what of the fate of the beloved Commissioner Gallardo?

All this (or maybe some of this) in the next installment…

Sharkham Asylum: A Serious Horse on a Serious Earth

For more Shark Horse or other things written by Jeffrey Kieviet, check out the AUTHOR ARCHIVE


  1. Derek Hobson Reply

    God damnit, Jeff. Haha, all this set-up, all this storytelling for an accurate representation of chimera Shark on Horse mixed gender fish sex. HAHAHA!

    I like the development on Sigo though, I’m enjoying this arc even more than the last.

    I want to give Casey the opportunity to call dibs on the next round since he hasn’t revisited Shark Horse since Part 8, but otherwise, I think I could wrap up this arc in the next chapter.

    Loved the description of Domino’s face, it progressed organically from the top of her head down to her “pouty lips.”
    Lots of research on this chimera sex.

    Grammatical errors:
    “Y0u” — you used a zero.
    “”get over it” when she couldn’t” — I think the “she” is supposed to be “he,” right?

    Anyway, AWESOME!

    • J.K. Reply

      Haha, thank you. I have so much fun writing Shark Horse, it takes me to places I never thought I could go as an author. Putting two lovers inside each other is up there with decimating a Nazi army & ending WWII2 (world war II part 2?) by dropping the exploding body of Godzilla on Japan. Although I now realize I missed out on referencing Shark Horse’s giant clit from when he knocked Luigi’s head off at the end of part 7. The videos I had to watch to understand horse & shark mating have scarred me for life.

      The zero in “y0u” is representative of how empty you are. Haha! No, just a grammatical error.

      And the sentence is: ”’He tried to talk to her about it but she ignored him when she could, told him to “go away” and “get over it” when she couldn’t.”’ Which is meant to mean when SHE couldn’t ignore him. I stand by the sentence, but good to know the thought could have been expressed more clearly.

      Casey texted me that he wants part 11. The name Sharkham Asylum was his idea and he said he hoped this story arc would all be titled with shark puns. I think when we wrap up this story arc, we should try a couple other ideas on how to put these stories together. Casey & I have been discussing a side story about Raphael & Splinter making pizza, but I think it would be cool to have like a 5 part story written together, and then once it’s finished, we release the chapters every week, almost like a comic book. So if we discuss what’s going on in the Shark Horse universe, you and I can be working on the Klu Klux Klan in the OC storyline, while you and Casey do another Shark Horse story or stuff like that. Also, really want to get other writers involved in this universe. I’m going to try to get a Shark Horse timeline/bible put together next week.

      • Derek Hobson Reply

        Haha, gotcha and love it!

        Yeah, I like having the side-characters having their own stories.
        I’m hoping that Commissioner Gallardo doesn’t get killed because I’d even like to do a prequel story with him.

        I think the timeline is essential, since I’m realizing I don’t actually know what “Present Day” really is and, let’s face it, if Domino does end up having Sigo’s baby… then we need to piece what age that child would be at. And yeah, with the inclusion of when SeaWolf and Lady Shark Horse (LSH), piecing when they were created is important.

        Sidebar: The Raph and Splinter one could very well be written entirely in dialogue if that wasn’t already the plan.

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